We heart David Sedaris. Check this out from his newest book:
The suspenders and knickers were bad enough, but when I added a top hat, he planted himself in the doorway and physically prevented me from leaving the house. "It doesn't make sense," I remember him saying. "That hat with those pants, worn with the damn platform shoes ..." His speech temporarily left him, and he found himself waving his hands, no doubt wishing that they held magic wands. "You're just ... a [HOT] mess is what you are."
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